Antlers
by Faye C. Marie
Summary: Blood pounded in Lily's ears. Her face flushed from anger. How pigheaded, even for Potter! There were so many answers she could have given him as to why she kept saying no. But she didn't say any. She screamed, "Anteoculatia!" J/L.


**A/N: Hello, readers of this fanfic. I'm Fayecee. Usually, I'm over in the Percy Jackson and the Olympians section, but lately I've become obsessed with Maruader-age fics. Before I knew it, plot bunnies were attacking, and I decided to write this. Feel free to flame and say how bad it is; I appreciate criticism, and would like to know what to do better. Read, review, and enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I'm not J.K. Rowling. I'm just an aspiring author. Thus, I do not own Harry Potter.**

**Summary: 'Blood pounded in Lily's ears. Her face flushed from anger. How pigheaded, even for Potter! There were so many answers she could have given him as to why she kept saying no. But she didn't say any. She'd actually brandished her wand and screamed, "Anteoculatia!"' J/L.  
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**Rated: T for swearing and some sexual themes.**

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><p><span>Antlers<span>

_Stupid McGonagall_, Lily thought as she skimmed the bookshelves in the Transfiguration section. _Stupid Transfiguration. Stupid exams. _

Her eyes wandered on a book entitled _The Beginners Guide to Animal Transfiguration. _Perfect. She quickly grabbed the menacingly large book (was it really necessary for it to be that big?) and scurried back to her table. She'd specifically chosen it so she could hide from the first and second years studying at the front and still have a good berth of the snogging six and seventh years near the back.

Lily dropped the heavy novel on top of an ever-growing pile of Transfiguration resources and plopped down in her seat. She'd been studying for the Transfiguration final for at least the last month, but she still didn't feel prepared. It was a pass-or-fail situation; she'd always been dreadful at Transfiguration, but now she found herself terribly behind the rest of the class. McGonagall said that if she didn't get at least an E on the final she wouldn't be allowed to take the class during seventh year. And, as Lily wanted to be an Auror, she needed the dreadful class, like it or not.

She started shuffling papers and transfigured objects around to clear space. Holding up a hand mirror she'd made out of a few paperclips, Lily noticed how pale she was. All her friends were outside taking a break from studying; or, in Emmeline's case, probably ogling at the Quidditch players. They'd tried to get her to take a break with them this morning, only to have her pelt them with her transfiguring supplies until they left. After exams, she was so going outside for awhile. A long, uninterrupted, sun-filled while.

Breathing deeply, Lily set the mirror down and opened the book she'd just gotten as well as several on Animagi. Hopefully she'd be able to sort out the confusion she was having on the whole Animagi-vrs.-transfigured-human problem she was having.

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><p>Two chapters, three paper cuts, and a bunch of note-taking later, Lily's brain felt fried. The only new knowledge she'd gained about her subject was that the authors of Transfiguration books must be barmy old gits who enjoy confusing arm movements and senseless directions. Charms never perplexed her like this. Oh, wonderful Charms. Maybe she could take a short break and head over to the Charms section for a second. She'd heard that there was a new book on Charm theory—<p>

Lily shook her head a few times. No, she needed to focus on Transfiguration for now. There'd be time for Charms (oh, lovely Charms) after she'd passed the exam.

She was debating a quick run down to the kitchens for something to eat when a certain annoying voice broke through her bubble of thought.

"Ah, Evans. Ever the bookworm. Studying ahead for NEWTs, are we?"

Lily begrudgingly looked up. Sure enough, the pompous, arrogant, messy haired, bespectacled, hazel eyed, Qudditch-obsessed, bullying toerag she loved to hate was standing over her, looking smug.

"What, Potter?"

James blinked innocently (like he'd ever _been_ innocent). "Why, can't I drop by and say hi?"

Lily grinned cheekily. "Then you wouldn't be Potter. You'd be Remus, or one of my actual mates. Just ask it and move along."

"I already did. Are you studying for—"

"You and I both know that's not the real question," Lily interrupted. She intended to stop there, but for some reason she blurted out, "And, no, I'm not working ahead for NEWTs. I'm studying for the Transfiguration final. I'm awfully dreadful at the subject."

Lily's eyes widened, completely surprised about what she'd just said. She hadn't meant to say that! She'd just given the enemy ammunition! She mentally slapped herself. _Shit! Shit! Shit!_

James blinked as well, momentarily shocked by the outburst of personal information. He rebounded quickly though, coming back with a mocking grin. "Oh yeah. I seem to remember a certain fire-breathing chicken incident last week."

Lily blushed, still berating herself about her unintentional spill. "Not fair. In my defense, McGonagall wasn't all that clear on the hand movements for that spell."

"Suuuuree," James said, his grin widening, "I just feel so bad for that poor salamander."

Lily's face was now the exact same shade as a beet root. "Just say it and go, Potter," she mumbled as she fidgeted with her quill, head down.

James' grin fell a bit. "Alright then. Lily, will you go out—"

"No."

"There. Question asked. Mind if I ask another?"

Lily looked up from her twitching hands. "Ask it so you can go."

"Do you want help?"

"_What_?"

"Do. You. Want. Help?" James repeated slowly. "I did get an O on the Transfiguration OWL. If you want I can—"

"No. I'm about done anyways," Lily hurriedly said. She started stacking up books and tossing materials into her bag. The book on human-to-animal transfigurations plopped onto the floor in front of James. _Fuck._

"C'mon, Evans. You can barely turn a match into a needle without blowing something up. Let me help—"

"No, Potter," Lily leaned down to get the book just as he did. Her forehead collided with the back of his head with an audible _smack_.

"Ow!" both of them exclaimed, gaining attention from both the gaggles of younger students and—gulp—Madame Pince. They straightened up immediately, turning towards the librarian. She glared at the pair, almost willing them to shout something else so she'd have an excuse to remove them from the library.

Lily bit her lip nervously, still rubbing her forehead. James dismissed the angry Frenchwoman with a weak wave and one of his dashing Potter grins that made all the females at school swoon and fawn over him.

(That is, besides Professor McGonagall and Lily.)

Madame Pince blinked a few times. She said something in French under her breath, turned away from the two, and shuffled over to dust one of the shelves by the Defense Against the Dark Arts section.

"Sorry about that," James mumbled once the librarian had lost his attention. "Is your forehead okay?"

Lily reached down and grabbed the book before James could even move. "I'm _fine_."

Lily glanced down at the page the book had opened to, discussing the Anteoculatia **(1)** hex, which causes the person hit by the hex to grow antlers. Huh. Good to know. She shut the book and tossed it into her bag as well.

James stiffened. "Do you want my help or—"

"Are you still _on _that? No!"

"Can you let me finish a damn sentence?" James asked in an incredulous whisper. "It's not like I'm asking you to marry me or anything. All I want to do is help."

"Yeah," Lily mumbled, "Help get you on a date with me." She stood upright, slung her bag over her shoulder, and rushed out of the library.

James smacked the table with his hand, earning another reproachful glance from Madame Pince. He gave her another apologetic smile and then rushed out after Lily. He looked up and down the hallway until he saw her speed walking down an empty corridor towards the Great Hall.

James ran to catch up to her. "Lily," he called down the corridor, "Stop acting like you don't need anyone and just accept my offer. You just told me how you're terrible at Transfiguration. You aren't going to pass if you keep acting like a cocky bitch that won't let anyone new in."

Lily paused, surprised he'd followed her. Most times where they fought Potter let her storm off, and the pestered her later. As James caught up, her shock levels dropped. He must've been bored of seducing slaggy fifth years. Yeah, that worked. And he must have decided to try his luck again on the Ask-Lily-Evans-Out-Game he'd been playing since third year when his hormones had kicked in. He'd always been unrelenting and unwilling to give up, but this was a bit excessive.

But as James approached, Lily realized that an overly persistent Potter wasn't going to do her any good. Might as well stop running and start yelling.

"That's rich, coming from you, Potter," she sneered as she turned to face him. "You're the most selfish, arrogant, pig-headed prick I've ever had the displeasure to meet."

James shrugged. "Nothing new. You've been saying that to me since first year."

Lily glared, her mind suddenly jumping back to the Animagi book. "You're so shallow. If you were an Animagi"—James smirked knowingly—"I'd bet you'd be a stag."

"Why?" James asked, his grin widening, "You think I'm adorable, like those fawns?"

"Oh, Merlin no," Lily exclaimed. "It's because they're too proud and cocky, like you. Plus they're in danger half the time. They're always going around, getting hit by cars and shot by hunters. I can totally see you being run over because you were chasing Sirius in the street."

"I'm not in danger half the time."

"You are when you're trying to ask me out, and that's more than half the time."

James' grin fell. "Stop with the shit, Evans. Just say yes."

"Not in this lifetime."

James flung his hands into the air. "Holy Merlin, woman! Why do you keep saying no?"

"Maybe it's because _I'm not interested!_"

James blinked a couple of times. "But how can you_ not _be?" he blurted out before he could think.

Lily's mouth set into a thin line, and James knew he'd gone a bit too far.

Blood pounded in Lily's ears. Her face flushed from anger. How pigheaded, even for Potter! There were so many answers she could have given him. He was arrogant, imprudent, lazy, a bully, not in the slightest pleasant to look at (although a small part of her disagreed with that, a part that she considered the more 'hormonally influenced' part of her brain), imposing, a manwhore—

But she didn't say any of those things. No she did not.

She'd actually brandished her wand and said, "Anteoculatia!"

Later, when Lily thought back on the event, she realized that she could have gotten into quite a bit of trouble by casting that spell, not to mention there were plenty of other things she could have done to show Potter how much she loathed him. The corridor was out in the open, and a teacher could have come by and seen the pair, giving her the second detention of her life (the first was last year after a prank-war gone wrong between her mates and the Marauders, but that's another story). Not to mention the fact that she was a Prefect, and Prefects didn't stoop to the levels of immature boys who don't know when to accept _no_ as an answer. They were supposed to rise above and all that crap, and give the immature boy in question a detention or dock house points.

And then there was the fact she'd actually not _intended_ to curse him. She was actually trying to figure out a way to fit about a dozen or so good cuss words into a coherent sentence when her hand had just so happened to slip into her robe pocket and pull out her wand. Her mouth must have taken this as a signal to curse him, so she'd… done it.

Or maybe it was because she was already having a shitty day when he came and made it worse. Maybe her headache and the musty smell of parchment and the blood loss from paper cuts had gotten to her and convinced her psyche it was fine to hit him.

Nevertheless, she was actually feeling better when the jet of bright green light hit James square in the chest.

That feeling went away though once he doubled over, clutching the top of his head. And that feeling was replaced with a sense of guilt that really shouldn't have been there.

"Evans," James panted, "why the bloody hell did you—"

He didn't get a chance to finish his sentence though, as the spell was taking affect and, as Lily observed, seemed quite painful. James yanked his hands off his head as tiny, little nubs shot out of the mop of his hair, growing longer and thicker until they were ten inches, eleven, twelve, fifteen inches above his head. Biting the inside of his check to prevent himself from screaming, he leaned against the wall of the corridor and grappled around for his wand in his pocket. When the pain had numbed, and James felt stable enough to stand, he noticed Lily was staring at him, open-mouthed. She'd actually done the spell right on the first try.

Giggles started bubbling up in her chest, building in pressure until a few were forced up her throat and escaped through her mouth. At first it was one, then two, and then suddenly Lily had burst into hysterics, laughing harder than she did last month when Alice had accidentally shot her with the Cheering Charm. She stood there for God knows how long, cackling at the sight of Potter with giant antlers.

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><p>Years later, after she'd actually given in to the small, growing feelings she'd had for James since that day (or, possibly before then) she noticed the irony in the situation, and started laughing again.<p>

"Lily?" James asked as he walked into the kitchen, staring at his wife. She was leaning against the counter, snickers escaping from her lips. "What's so funny?"

"Oh, James," she gasped through tears of laughter, "do you remember the time where I gave you antlers?"

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><p><em>~Fin~<em>

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><p><strong>(1) That actually is a real hex. Pansy Parkinson was hit with it in OotP as Fred and George were leaving Hogwarts. Look it up if you want :)<strong>


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